Why San Francisco Rocks and New York City Sucks!

If you read my last post, you know that I am now riding a bicycle, in NYC.

So why am I so pissed off? Good question. I'll tell you why. Buses! Buses? Yes, Buses. I have no idea what the personality or demeanor is of a San Francisco bus is, but I know two things. First, the personality and demeanor of NYC bus drivers suck harder than a pornstar, and the buses in San Francisco have bicycle racks.

I'll deal with the first one first. I have met and interacted with an MTA bus driver, outside of his professional capacity, but he is not a driver of a local route; he drives (or drove - I think he has since retired) an express route, from Staten Island to Manhattan. A few weeks before I met him, I noticed a sign on a train stating that assaulting an MTA work was punishable by a seven year prison sentence. When I did meet him, I asked two questions. First, why; and second (partially in response to his answer, but primarily as a function of a taxpaying customer of the MTA), without that law, would MTA employees actually be nice, customer-friendly, or (at the very least) willing to do the job they are being paid to do (by tax-payers). I will not go into how I have to spend the little bit of money that New York City is willing to piss upon me, as an employee (conservatives call it Reaganomics), so that I can then funnel it back into the cesspool known as the MTA (the Wal-mart strategy of paying your employees enough to shop at your store, but nowhere else).

His response was that MTA workers were being assaulted. I understand and agree that noone should be assault in the performance of their job. I'll deal with the police in a second. Times up. Look to that post I made about being pulled over. That cop (and all like him) deserves to be assaulted and anally raped by an elephant with syphilis. If you are doing your job, then you should be protected, but if you are the douchebag making the unintelligible announcements at the Flatbush Avenue stop of the 2/5 trains, you better pull your prison culture inspired pants about your ass, because you are who (in my world) the elephant is looking for. It is a microphone, not a megaphone. But back to the point, SF v. NYC.

I live in Brooklyn (Go Brooklyn!!), and my mother lives in Staten Island. Grammatically, she lives on Staten Island, but being a Staten Island resident imparts bigger problems than grammar (lord knows, grammar (along with common sense, logic, and human decency) is something that has never found its way onto that god-forsaken sandbar). Why is it that I have to go into Manhattan, with my bicycle, to get to Staten Island, from Brooklyn? There is a bridge. The people in San Francisco know which one it is. It is the one that held the record for being the longest suspension bridge (one inch longer than the Golden Gate Bridge). It is called the Veranzzano Narroaws Bridge.

Why can't I ride my bicycle to Bay Ridge (god help me), and get on a bus to cross the bridge and continue my trip? San Francisco buses have bicycle racks. Okay, San Francisco has earthquakes too, but San Francisco never had a mayor whose police commissioner was the most corrupt person in the city (that's right Guiliani, I'm talking about your buddy Bernard Keryk).